Picture of the day comes from MTV's Wildboyz website:

Yes, Steve-O and Chris are disguised as the zebra.

"You know the world is going crazy when:
the best rapper is a white guy,
the best golfer is a black guy,
the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese,
the Swiss hold the America's Cup,
France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance,
Germany doesn't want to go to war,
and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.'
Need I say more?"

Chris Rock

"You know it's gone to hell, when the best rapper out there is a white guy and the best golfer is a black guy."

Charles Barkley, a few months later.

2004 World Series of Poker update:

It began on Saturday, and there are 2500 players who paid the $10,000 buy-in this year. First place gets $5 million.

Chris Moneymaker is already out, losing when one of only 2 cards that could've beat him came up. I guess last year's luck wasn't with him this year...

Top 10 Homer Simpson quotes:

10) To the tune of the Oscar Meyer theme song:
My bologna has a first name. It's H-O-M-E-R, my bologna has a second name. It's H-O-M-E-R.

9) Marge, I can't wear a pink shirt to work. Everybody wears white shirts. I'm not popular enough to be different.

8) A big mountain of sugar is too much for one man. I can see now why God portions it out in those little packets.

7) Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

6) Looking at waffle on the ceiling:
Lord, I know I shouldn't eat Thee, but... mmm... sacrelicious.

5) To the tune of the Village People's Macho Man:
Nacho, nacho man. I want to be a nacho man.

4) Praying:
Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me. As an offering, I present these milk and cookies. If you wish me to eat them instead, please give me no sign whatsoever...

3) To the tune of the Flintstones opening:
Simpson-Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in his-tor-y.
From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree. D'oh!

2) I am so smart, I am so smart, s-m-r-t... I mean s-m-A-r-t.

1) Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No!
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal!
Homer: He he he... ooh... yeah... right, Lisa. A wonderful... magical animal.

Link of the day:

NPR interview with Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog

Currently the top story at CNN.com:

Previous commencement speakers at Harvard University:

Robert Rubin, former U.S. Treasury Secretary
Alan Greenspan, chairman of the Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System
Mary Robinson, the United Nations high commissioner for human rights and former president of the Republic of Ireland
Madeleine Albright, Secretary of State
Harold Varmus, director of the National Institutes of Health
Will Ferrell, Christmas elf, frat guy, and school cheerleader
Conan O'Brien, visionary of the Springfield monorail and prognosticator for the Year 2000

Was this even crazier than Robert Horry's 3 to beat the Kings in 2002?

The ad of the day comes from Dave Chao:

Link of the day:

The secret behind Google's search technology

You know how when you go to Palace Buffet (an all-you-can-eat-Korean-BBQ place), guys will want to try to eat as much meat as possible? Usually that means not eating too much rice or sides.

Here's Carroll's suggestion, heard at last night's Parker House dinner:

"Instead of drinking water, you could just swish the water in your mouth and then spit it out. That way you won't get full because of water."

Wow. I wonder how funny it would be if someone went with a bucket so that they could spit out their water.

Did y'all hear about Moises Alou? Here's a blurb from an ESPN.com article:

"Alou says the secret to hitting without batting gloves is to harden your hands and prevent calluses. One of his methods might win someone the prize money on the TV show, "Fear Factor." He urinates on his hands. That's the honest truth. Alou said he isn't sure where he learned this distasteful folk medicine, but it wasn't from his famous father. And it works for Moises."

Why am I such an idiot?

I left my ATM card at an ATM for the second time in 7 months. I also left my wallet at an ATM a year ago.

I've been extremely lucky though, because the wallet was still there when I went back for it, and the ATM cards were destroyed by the bank. One of these days my luck is gonna run out, so I gotta stop this bad habit.

Today's quote of the day is brought to you by Angels outfielder Garret Anderson, who's currently injured and not playing:

"When you see me out there playing, that's when you'll see me playing."

Very wise.

Yesterday had to be the most frustrating day I've ever had at work.

I cost myself at least 3 hours of time because I cut something from my desktop onto our file server, instead of copying it. The file became corrupted when I tried to put it on the file server, so now I can't open the document anymore.

I could've saved all this grief had I copied it, because then I'd still have the file on my desktop.

So now our Helpdesk people are going to see if they can recover the file. If they can't, that means I have to do about 6 hours of work over again!