Ryan Freel set a Cincinnati Red record with 5 stolen bases last night.

This is just one short of the modern day record of 6, held by Otis Nixon.

Why do I mention this? Because it gives me an excuse to re-publish the following news article:


Otis Nixon

Former Atlanta Braves center fielder Otis Nixon was arrested in January 2004 after allegedly threatening his bodyguard with a knife at a Georgia hotel, police said.

Brown, 37, told police that Nixon called him and asked the bodyguard to pick up one of Nixon's female friends and bring her to the hotel. While he was on his way to the woman's home, Nixon called Brown again and told him to return to the hotel.

Brown said he went into the hotel room and noticed that Nixon was naked and yelling into his cellphone. Brown said he asked Nixon to put some clothes on, but Nixon ignored him. Nixon became upset when Brown asked him to repay some money that was owed him, Brown told police.

Still naked, Nixon grabbed a kitchen knife and chased Brown out of the room, according to a police report. During the scuffle, Nixon also threatened him with another blade, a black-handled folding knife, Brown told police.

Nixon was also heard yelling: "I will cut your heart out," according to the police report. Brown was not harmed during the incident.

Nixon told police that Brown was the aggressor in the fight. Nixon said he was naked because he was waiting for his female friend to arrive.

Nixon played with the Atlanta Braves from 1991 to 1993. He helped the Braves get to the postseason in 1991 by stealing 72 bases. That same year he was suspended for cocaine use.

Basile just updated his photo site. Here's a couple random pictures:

Found at the Yosemite gift shop:



Hmmm... I think the person who designed that pencil should've gotten a second opinion...



I don't know why I choose to incriminate myself.

From America: The Book, by the writers of The Daily Show With Jon Stewart.

Chapter 7 / page 131
The Media: Democracy's Guardian Angel

A free and independent press is essential to the health of a functioning democracy. It serves to inform the voting public on matters relevant to its well-being. Why they've stopped doing that is a mystery.

I mean, 300 camera crews outside a courthouse to see what Kobe Bryant is wearing when the judge sets his hearing date, while false information is used to send our country to war goes unchecked?

What *** **** happened? These spineless cowards in the press have finally gone too far. They have violated a trust.

"Was the president successful in convincing the country?"
Who gives * ****? Why not tell us if what he said was true?

And the excuses. My God, the excuses!
"Hey, we just give the people what they want."
"What can you do, this administration is secretive."
"But the last season of Friends really is news."

The unmitigated gall of these weak-willed....You're supposed to be helping us...

Some Yosemite pictures stolen from Carroll's blog.

Vernal Falls



The first (and only) rock I got to climb:

In a work-related e-mail I got today, the subject read:
Obfuscation functionality in our software

This was the first time I've ever had to use www.dictionary.com to look up a word at work.

The definition of obfuscation:

1) confusion resulting from failure to understand
[Synonyms: bewilderment, puzzlement, befuddlement, mystification, bafflement, bemusement]

2) the activity of obscuring people's understanding, leaving them baffled or bewildered
[Synonym: mystification]

3) darkening or obscuring the sight of something

So I suppose I can say that this e-mail title obfuscated me enough to use a dictionary.

Back from Yosemite. Basile, Carroll, G1 and I went, but it wasn't exactly "camping".

We had tent cabins and ate out every meal. On the last night, our place even had towels, sheets, and pillows. We called it a zero-star motel.

Random notes:
1) At night, we played Pusoy Dos (Big 2) to determine who would sleep in which cot. The first 2 nights, we had 2 small cots and 1 large cot, so the 2 losers had to sleep in the same cot. And yes, I ended up sleeping in the same cot as G1 for one night.
2) Hiked up to Vernal Falls. G1 and I had already hiked this trail during our senior retreat.
3) I dislocated my shoulder while rock climbing and was only able to climb for the first of 6 hours.

For those who don't know, I originally dislocated my shoulder while celebrating someone else's bowling success. (The person didn't even get a strike or spare.)

It's not as ridiculous as getting injured while sneezing (Sammy Sosa), but it's still pretty bad nonetheless...

I'm off to Yosemite for the next few days...

More Chappelle's Show:

The Making The Band sketch

Basile, this is for you:

P. Diddy:
"If I had my way, I'd never work. I'd just stay home all day, watch Scarface 50 times, eat a turkey sandwich, and have *** all ******* day. Then I'd dress up like a clown, and surprise kids at schools. Then I'd take a dump in the back of a movie theater, and just wait until somebody sat in it. Hear it squish. That's funny to me. Then I'd paint, and read, and play violin. I'd climb the mountains, and sing the songs that I like to sing. But I don't got that kinda time."

The gay landscaper from Chappelle's Show.

The other day, The Sports Guy did a list of the most valuable players in basketball. The criteria is based on real-life salary, age, and the following:

If Carmelo Anthony comes in at No. 19, players 1 through 19 are all players about whom Denver would probably say, "We hate giving up 'Melo, but there's no way we can pass up that deal." And they wouldn't trade him for any player listed between Nos. 19 and 40.

So I decided to try to create a similar top 10 list for baseball. Here's my list, with one honorable mention:

Note: FA Year stands for Free Agent Year, the year that the player can become a free agent.

Rank	Player	Age	2005 Salary	Current Contract	FA year
HM	Bobby Abreu	31	$13.10 M	5 years, $64M	2007
10	BJ Upton	20	$0.25 M	Year-to-year	2010
9	Miguel Tejada	29	$10.78 M	6 years, $72 M	2009
8	Mark Teixeira	25	$3.63 M	4 years, $9.5 M ends 2005	2008
7	Rich Harden	23	$0.75 M	4 years, $9 M	2008
6	Vladimir Guerrero	29	$12.50 M	5 years, $70 M	2008
5	Jake Peavy	24	$0.75 M	4 years, $15 M	2008
4	David Wright	22	$0.32 M	Year-to-year	2010
3	Johan Santana	26	$4.75 M	4 years, $40 M	2008
2	Miguel Cabrera	22	$0.37 M	Year-to-year	2009
1	Albert Pujols	"25"	$11.00 M	7 years, $100 M	2010

HM) Bobby Abreu

• Abreu probably isn't number 11 on the list, but for a team that's looking to win in 2005 , you could do worse than the most underrated player in baseball today. How underrated? I could make a case that Abreu's age 24-30 seasons were better than Ken Griffey Jr's age 24-30 seasons-- and Griffey didn't start getting injured until age 31.

10) BJ Upton

• The most important numbers here are under the columns Age and FA year. He's the best prospect in baseball, no matter how bad people think his defense is.

9) Miguel Tejada

• The decline phase of his career will start sometime during this contract, but you wouldn't know it by the way he's been playing since he signed with the Orioles.

8) Mark Teixeira

• Here's the power of Scott Boras for you: Teixeira would be in the top 5 and Mark Prior would've made the top 10 if Scott Boras wasn't their agent.

7) Rich Harden

• For anyone who doubts Billy Beane's ability as a GM, just look at the value under Current Contract again.

6) Vladimir Guerrero

• Ironically, Vlad's back problems in 2003 are the only reason he's on this list. Otherwise, there would've been an all-out bidding war for him when he was a free agent.

5) Jake Peavy

• Given the spacious dimensions of Petco Park, Peavy is in great position to grab a Cy Young in the very near future.

4) David Wright

• Analysts often refer to him as "the next Scott Rolen". Usually this represents a player's upside, but considering Wright has slightly outperformed Rolen during their respective age 21 and 22 seasons, that upside has already turned into reality.

3) Johan Santana

• Of all of the pitchers in baseball history, the pitcher that is most similar to Johan Santana at age 26 is Sandy Koufax.

2) Miguel Cabrera

• Cabrera has an even more impressive comparables list. Half of his top 20 comparables are current or future Hall Of Famers: Hank Aaron, Frank Robinson, Gary Carter, Al Kaline, Alex Rodriguez, Ken Griffey Jr, Eddie Murray, Johnnie Bench, Orlando Cepeda, and...

1) Albert Pujols

• 7 year contracts given to slow, powerful first basemen usually end up like the ones given out to Mo Vaughn and Jason Giambi. The fact that Pujols' 7 year contract is a bargain is just one of many testaments of his talent.

Sometimes it's important to know the difference between whether something is difficult or if it is impossible...

Case in point:

If you...

1) Place an egg in the palm of your hand
2) Close your fingers around the egg
3) Squeeze the egg as hard as you can

...it will be difficult to break the egg. Difficult, but not impossible.

(This is true because the force and pressure of your squeeze is spread out over the whole surface of the eggshell.)

I mention all this because Basile said yesterday that he couldn't break an egg this way. Assuming this was impossible, he had Dentist Dave try it out...

And after Dave squeezed for about 5 seconds, the egg exploded across our apartment. Much of it was spread across the white khakis I was wearing.